We all have ideas on how our life may look, but until things actually happen, there’s no knowing how life will pan out. Which is exciting and scary at the same time. I recently wrote about things I learned from my quarter-life crisis. In a couple of months, I will be turning 28 and I no longer stress and worry about the things I used to. Have all my ‘problems’ been solved? Definitely not! There are still many unwritten chapters. Let’s take a look at what has changed that has enabled my outlook to be much more positive. Hopefully this will help put your mind at ease.
Self Confidence
I started my first job just before I was 16 and continued to work there whilst I was at College & Uni. It wasn’t until I started my first graduate job that I really became into my own and was able to feel confident in my own decisions. What didn’t help was that my first job wasn’t very encouraging, if you were explaining a policy to customers, the manager would eventually come down and override what you had been explaining. The dynamic completed shifted in my jobs after this, I worked in flat hierarchy structures where we were empowered to make decisions on our own. This has significantly changed my entire confidence and how I handle situations in my personal life. I know what I will and won’t tolerate. Higher confidence gave me the edge in order to pursue more for myself, jobs, travel, starting a business – even writing this blog! MUST READ: Love Yourself First.
Feeling secure in myself
When your self confidence grows, you have this sense of security that’s unshakeable. I’ve been through ups and downs and I know that I will be just fine whatever happens. People will come in and out of your life, that’s just the way it is. I am so glad that I’ve had the chance to get comfortable on my own but also experience the beauty of connections with others.
Realising what’s out of your control
I used to worry about a lot of things, but when I really sat down and thought about it, they were all completely out of my control. We can have an idea for how we want our life to be, but you don’t have complete control over how it’s going to pan out. Focus on the things that you can control and you will be a lot happier. MUST READ: How to Find Inner Peace.
Things don’t happen how you thought AND THAT’S OKAY!
We’ve all done it – I want to be married by *this age*, kids by *this age*. Life really does not happen that way, TRUST ME. It can if you want it to be….I guess it depends what other values you hold around the conditions you would like to make these things happen. I’ve walked away from multiple relationships knowing that it wasn’t the path I wanted to go down. Yes, I want to get married and have kids but I also don’t want to sacrifice my values just to make it happen quicker. Life doesn’t end after your twenties, we are living longer and longer, so what’s the rush?
There’s no right or wrongs in life
Sometimes you will be faced with crossroads and you won’t know what the ‘right’ decision is. Not like at school when it’s right or wrong, life choices just change the course that you are on. Make sure you are in tune with what you want out of life and how you want your future to look – this will make it so much easier for you to decide. MUST READ: What To Do When You Feel Lost In Life
Put your happiness first
Above all, make sure you are doing things that make you happy. You don’t have to stay in a job you hate – it’s very empowering to quit, haha been there done that! If a relationship is wrong for you, don’t stay in it. Sometimes we overcomplicate problems because we don’t know how the next chapter will look. The best thing to do is make the leap and just see what happens. They are some of life’s best adventures.
Don’t shy away from fear
Change is scary, the unknown is terrifying but if you want more, then something needs to change. How does that happen? You have to embrace or at least endure fear. Honestly, I look back when I was interviewing a ton after university and although I spent most of that time incredibly nervous, it was so exciting because I knew I was on the brink of change! From interviews, to dates, even solo travel. You never know what’s just around the corner. MUST READ: Nothing Changes If Nothing Changes.
Don’t write yourself off in your early twenties because you feel as though you can’t do things or you aren’t confident enough. I promise you, if you put yourself out there, things will change and you will grow. Focus on yourself and always put you first. Use your twenties you figure out what you really want from life; travel, change jobs, love, and experience as much as you can.
If you went through a quarter-life crisis, do you feel better now in your late twenties? How are you feeling about turning Thirty?
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